I know I have been M.I.A. but I have just been in a different place lately. I have been helping organize fund raisers for my brother in law that has stage IV melanoma cancer. When someone you love has cancer it does effect you on a daily basis. You worry about them continuously every minute of the day. As scary as that sounds in all of this I have been amazed at the kindness of others. So many people have stepped up to help, show love and just care.
It is beautiful!
In all of the sadness that cancer brings into your life through it good things rise to the surface. It just goes to show that no matter what life throws your way the human spirit is stronger. Our minds and our hearts can stay the course and get us through anything.
Tomorrow we are holding a benefit yard sale, bake sale and I cannot believe I am saying this but we have more stuff than we even know what to do with! More people than we could ever imagine helping and tomorrow is going to be full of love and healing energy, I am looking forward to it.
This is a perfect example of a life well lived. My brother in law has always been an amazing person and now when he is in need all of the love that he has shown in his life is coming back to him. When he is through all of this I can only imagine what he will be like. Something like amazingness on steriods comes to mind ;)
I want to say thank you to all of you who have helped and offered your love. We feel it and appreciate it so much.
Shannon
XO
Friday, August 27, 2010
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Things that made me smile
You know it is easy to get wrapped up in all the bad and negative in this world. I find at the moments when I feel I am at my lowest are the times that I am not paying attention to the beauty right in front of me.
Last week I decided I would take pictures of things that make me happy, that make me smile and feel good. This morning as I look through the pictures I find that it is my core, my family and I am so blessed.
To be a kid...
Rotten Reagan and Carson and their calf pen that they turned into a hut or as they say "A full on house!"
Anthony's first boxing match...
He has been training 18 hours a week for months for this opportunity and I could not be more proud of him. YES it is a bit tough to watch but he knows what he is doing and is very good at it. You can see the full fight HERE.
A tea party for me...
My nieces love to have a tea party when I come visit. I just love it so much! They are adorable and remind me to always "Keep your pinky up".
My happiness this past week in a nutshell. Some things may be off kilter by a long way but there are so many more that are right on.
Take today to look around you and embrace what brings you joy, what makes you smile and share love with those that you come across.
Much Love,
Shannon
XO
Last week I decided I would take pictures of things that make me happy, that make me smile and feel good. This morning as I look through the pictures I find that it is my core, my family and I am so blessed.
To be a kid...
Anthony's first boxing match...
A tea party for me...
My happiness this past week in a nutshell. Some things may be off kilter by a long way but there are so many more that are right on.
Take today to look around you and embrace what brings you joy, what makes you smile and share love with those that you come across.
Much Love,
Shannon
XO
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Should I be in a 12 step program?
I have wondered many times in my whole obsession to lose weight if I have a serious mental issue that goes much farther than my self diagnosed A.D.D. This morning I was watching a show called Too Fat For 15. It is about kids at a camp learning how to eat properly and lose weight. Kind of like a biggest loser but nice, lol. The kids were talking about how they eat without thinking and it all just seems out of control. Something about that made me google to see if there was an Overeaters Anonymous in our area.
Now the thought of even giving in to attend such a thing is just more than I have ever brought myself to imagine attending. Then I read the following information from their page:
In Overeaters Anonymous, you'll find members who are extremely overweight, even morbidly obese; moderately overweight; average weight; underweight; still maintaining periodic control over their eating behavior; or totally unable to control their compulsive eating.
OA members experience many different patterns of food behaviors. These "symptoms" are as varied as our membership. Among them are:
•obsession with body weight, size and shape
•eating binges or grazing
•preoccupation with reducing diets
•starving
•laxative or diuretic abuse
•excessive exercise
•inducing vomiting after eating
•chewing and spitting out food
•use of diet pills, shots and other medical interventions to control weight
•inability to stop eating certain foods after taking the first bite
•fantasies about food
•vulnerability to quick-weight-loss schemes
•constant preoccupation with food
•using food as a reward or comfort
Our symptoms may vary, but we share a common bond: we are powerless over food and our lives are unmanageable. This common problem has led those in OA to seek and find a common solution in the Twelve Steps, the Twelve Traditions and eight tools of Overeaters Anonymous.
I decided to see how many of the 14 items match me. It is 10! 10 out of freakin' 14!!!!! WTF!! Yes that is an FFFFFFFFFFF! Seriously should I be attending these meetings? Am I that far out of control? Are the answers to my continuous 22 year diet at one of these meetings?
Right now the whole thought of all of it is insanely scary to even think about. My over the top eating habits are in full force right now with the stress in my life. It makes me question why I cannot maintain control. Why I do the things I do knowing full well of the outcome. It is bizarre that such self sabotaging behavior is something I am used to. Just so much to think about.
I am curious have you ever attended an Overeaters Anonymous meeting? What did you find? What have you heard? It seems so taboo in my world and I don't know why. I also think this may be the strangest post I have ever written!
A really shocked,
Shannon
Now the thought of even giving in to attend such a thing is just more than I have ever brought myself to imagine attending. Then I read the following information from their page:
In Overeaters Anonymous, you'll find members who are extremely overweight, even morbidly obese; moderately overweight; average weight; underweight; still maintaining periodic control over their eating behavior; or totally unable to control their compulsive eating.
OA members experience many different patterns of food behaviors. These "symptoms" are as varied as our membership. Among them are:
•obsession with body weight, size and shape
•eating binges or grazing
•preoccupation with reducing diets
•starving
•laxative or diuretic abuse
•excessive exercise
•inducing vomiting after eating
•chewing and spitting out food
•use of diet pills, shots and other medical interventions to control weight
•inability to stop eating certain foods after taking the first bite
•fantasies about food
•vulnerability to quick-weight-loss schemes
•constant preoccupation with food
•using food as a reward or comfort
Our symptoms may vary, but we share a common bond: we are powerless over food and our lives are unmanageable. This common problem has led those in OA to seek and find a common solution in the Twelve Steps, the Twelve Traditions and eight tools of Overeaters Anonymous.
I decided to see how many of the 14 items match me. It is 10! 10 out of freakin' 14!!!!! WTF!! Yes that is an FFFFFFFFFFF! Seriously should I be attending these meetings? Am I that far out of control? Are the answers to my continuous 22 year diet at one of these meetings?
Right now the whole thought of all of it is insanely scary to even think about. My over the top eating habits are in full force right now with the stress in my life. It makes me question why I cannot maintain control. Why I do the things I do knowing full well of the outcome. It is bizarre that such self sabotaging behavior is something I am used to. Just so much to think about.
I am curious have you ever attended an Overeaters Anonymous meeting? What did you find? What have you heard? It seems so taboo in my world and I don't know why. I also think this may be the strangest post I have ever written!
A really shocked,
Shannon
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
The summer that did not make the list
Well hello blogging world! Did that remind you of an automated message from wordpress? LOL It does me just a little bit. I hope you have enjoyed your summer. Ours is coming to an end here in about a week and a half. I cannot believe it is almost over but at the same time if I had a list of top 10 summers this one probably would not make the list.
It is amazing how life can turn in the blink of an eye. I find myself trying to find a balance in a crazy impossible to balance situation but I am working on it. My hope is to get back on a fitness schedule as soon as my Rotten's go back to school on the 24th. I have had a sorta schedule but it is not consistent by any measure. I miss it. I miss my routine and I miss the way I feel when I work out consistently.
It is interesting because before summer started this was my plan-
Run in as many 5k's as possible
Do a triathlon
Swim 4 days a week
Workout with a trainer 2 days a week
Ride my bike 3 days a week
Have a blast with my children doing physical activity as often as possible.
This is what actually happened-
Day after school let out the cancer scare with Rotten #2 started.
A week after that my brother-in-law was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma.
Every morning hangs on a phone call that determines our day.
My husbands job changed.
Working out on most days has not happened.
The plan with my children has been a tough one but doing fairly good with it.
Instead of being completely self absorbed in my own petty issues I find myself helping someone I love.
Even with all of the chaos we are closer as a family because we are taking time to be present and appreciating so much more.
So I am not sure how that all balances out in the end. Just when we think we have things figured out sometimes God has a different plan. There is never a guarantee on the next moment and I have learned that first hand this summer. If I could change some of it you know I would in a heart beat but the lessons learned through this summer are priceless. I have seen more kindness than ever before in my life. I have realized that strength comes from places you would never expect and that every single second you have with someone you love is a blessing.
XO
Shannon
It is amazing how life can turn in the blink of an eye. I find myself trying to find a balance in a crazy impossible to balance situation but I am working on it. My hope is to get back on a fitness schedule as soon as my Rotten's go back to school on the 24th. I have had a sorta schedule but it is not consistent by any measure. I miss it. I miss my routine and I miss the way I feel when I work out consistently.
It is interesting because before summer started this was my plan-
Run in as many 5k's as possible
Do a triathlon
Swim 4 days a week
Workout with a trainer 2 days a week
Ride my bike 3 days a week
Have a blast with my children doing physical activity as often as possible.
This is what actually happened-
Day after school let out the cancer scare with Rotten #2 started.
A week after that my brother-in-law was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma.
Every morning hangs on a phone call that determines our day.
My husbands job changed.
Working out on most days has not happened.
The plan with my children has been a tough one but doing fairly good with it.
Instead of being completely self absorbed in my own petty issues I find myself helping someone I love.
Even with all of the chaos we are closer as a family because we are taking time to be present and appreciating so much more.
So I am not sure how that all balances out in the end. Just when we think we have things figured out sometimes God has a different plan. There is never a guarantee on the next moment and I have learned that first hand this summer. If I could change some of it you know I would in a heart beat but the lessons learned through this summer are priceless. I have seen more kindness than ever before in my life. I have realized that strength comes from places you would never expect and that every single second you have with someone you love is a blessing.
XO
Shannon
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